What is the definition of Decorating Alpha Male Skin Cells?

Decorating alpha male skin cells? That's like saying we're putting fancy nail polish on our superhero skin! We're not just tanning for a day, we're turning our bare alpha male canvas into a masterpiece of manly sophistication. It's the ultimate in self-care, but don't tell the rest of the guys you're trying to outshine your own inner Picasso while wearing a neon green, oversized Spider-Man t-shirt.

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Example sentence with an unsettling edge: "The alpha male decided to 'decorate his alpha male skin cells' with a newfound appreciation for high-end skincare, only to find out his reflection in the mirror was more obsessed with his glow-in-the-dark makeup than his own manhood."